Weird Science
by TateThePowerpuffFan
Summary: The Rowdyruff Boys are madly in love with the Powerpuff Girls, but they have no idea on how to approach them. They decide to create their own Powerpuff Girl that they can use for advice on how to act around girls, and gain the courage to ask the Girls out. However, their creation isn't exactly as sweet as they had hoped she would be, and she is also revealed to be extremely unique.
1. Swoonman

Disclaimer: I do not own the PPGs or rights to the movie mentioned. This story is purely for entertainment purposes of the readers.

**Chapter 1:**** Swoonman**

It was another average high school day in Townsville, and the bell rang to dismiss the students to their 6th period classes. Boomer and Butch are walking to the guy's locker room, when they notice Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup standing at their lockers, conversing amongst each other and laughing occasionally. The Boys have all had feelings for the Girls, but have no idea on how to approach them.

**Butch's POV**

"Just look at her, Boomer... she's so fine!" Butch's eyes were locked onto Buttercup, who was attempting to slam her locker shut after stockpiling everything inside of it. "She's definitely the baddest of the bad... and that's just, so hot!"

"What're you talking about? You're looking at the wrong chick! The real prize is the blondie over there, to the left! Bubbles!" My brother pointed at the cute girl with a long, flowing ponytail, who wore a blue & black Steve Miller Band t-shirt as well as a pair of stylish blue-jeans with tears in the knees. "She's so elegant, and just wants to let everything be, and **_that's_** what matters the most to me." Unbeknownst to either of us, Brick was approaching us from behind.

"Sup', guys. Y'all checking out the babes... **_again_**? Man, they are so out of your leagues, you know that?" Why was our brother always trying to bring us down?

"Oh, shut up, Brick! We both know that you get all google-eyed for Bloss-" Boomer shot back, only to be interrupted by Brick cupping his hand over his mouth.

"Say that out loud again, and I'll whack-a-mole you in the nads! **_Nobody_** can know that I'm falling for a **_Powerpuff_**!" He violently whispered into his face.

**Brick's POV**

"This is how it has to work out: as leader of the Rowdyruff Boys, I have to maintain a very aggressive reputation. I'm not supposed to waste my time giggling over no crushes! What I'm **_supposed_** to do, is constantly display my utter dominion over my idiot brothers, be the best varsity quarterback that this school has ever seen, **_and_** be the most popular dude in Townsville, all while maintaining my solid "D" average! Now, do you understand why we must work together as a brotherhood to keep this a **_secret_**?" We both nodded obediently, as they should. "I'm glad we have an understanding for my... **_our_**, dilemma."

"Hey guys, did ya' hear **_that_**? Our good ol' friend, **_Brick_** here, has a thing for **_Blossom_**!" Damn you, Mitch Mitchelson! Always listening in on everyone's conversations! Every guy who heard Mitch began violently laughing and pointing at **_me_**. Not either of my brothers, just **_me_**. My face grew redder than my eyes. I would've probably disemboweled Mitch right then and there, if only my varsity record wasn't at stake, or my inevitable future football scholarship to Ohio State. The passing period abruptly ended with the arrival of the second bell. We were already late, but still rocketed down the halls for the locker room. If there was anything that helped us take our minds off of our problems, it was kicking everybody's asses in P.E.

**Boomer's POV**

Brick can really suck. There. Now we can say I had my own opinion in the first chapter. Let's continue.


	2. Coach Shank

**Chapter 2:**** Coach Shank**

**Boomer's POV**

For almost every other guy in the school, our coach's name tag reads "Lucifer", but to us super powered teenage boys, he's the guy that we rely on to help get us through thick and thin. As we've said before, this is our blow-off class that we take to make the other guys feel ashamed of themselves, and hopefully that motivates them to better themselves, more often.

Our instructor goes by the name "Coach Shank", which I never really understood, because he's excellent at golf. He's like a third father to us, and he knows it. We beg him to make our routines and practices harder, but he always tells us that it's borderline impossible because of our superpowers that just automatically kick in. He's the greatest guy we know.

After we left the locker room (not without Brick being hassled by most of the guys in there), we were confronted by Coach. He pulled us aside, against the side wall of the gymnasium.

"What's goin' on, guys? This is the seventh time in three weeks that you've shown up after the bell. Even if you show up a nanosecond after the bell, like you always have, you're still late! What's holding you three back?"

**Brick's POV**

"Well Coach, believe it or not, we have girl problems." I told him straight up. He looked at us, puzzled.

"Huntin' for or dealin' with?" Coach asked with anticipation. Being from Mississippi, he always incorporated southern metaphors into his mentoring. That was always one of our favorite things about him.

"Huntin," Boomer choked.

"What's so difficult 'bout findin' chicks to go out with? Knowin' you three, I'd have thought that y'all hooked up for sport! You're each by far the greatest in the world for runnin', liftin', **_and_** football! I have no idea how each of you ain't **_buried_** in babes, right now!"

There was nothing other for me to say other than "We dig the Utonium girls... the Powerpuffs." Coach arched his eyebrow at me, and then scanned all of us with a wandering glare.

**Butch's POV**

"You make it sound like it would be harder to ask them out than any regular girl. What would be so difficult about it? They're such angels... most of them are angels, and they're all so nice towards everyone!"

Boomer intervened. "You do realize that we used to beat the piss outta' them, right coach? I think we've done so much to them, that I think it's impossible for them to forgive us!"

"Oh, stop bein' so hard-headed!"

"He can't help it, coach." Brick smirked. Coach blew him off while Boomer glared at him.

"Look, I remember when all that stuff was goin' on, alright? What was that, like, ten **_years_** ago? If you told 'em you were sorry, I guarantee you that they'd forgive ya', right then and there. Trust me, if there's one thing those girl's do best, it's moving on, and forgiving."

"Do you really think so, coach?" I asked with hope in my voice.

"Of course I do, Butch. It's the way of the world! Now all of you, go and do three times as much of each drill to help reestablish your masculinity, and think more clearly!"

Altogether, we proudly roared "Sir, yes sir!", and each split up to do our individual drills, all the way up until the next bell.


	3. The Levee Breaks

**Chapter 3:**** The Levee Breaks**

**Butch's POV**

After hitting the showers (believe it or not, we actually broke a sweat), we began slipping back into our regular outfits: jeans and rock tees. Even I was surprised when I got myself a Jethro Tull shirt, but hey, that dude can flute! Boomer wore none other than his Blue Öyster Cult shirt that he's had since eighth grade, and Brick, being the most devilish, sported AC/DC across his chest. As we left the locker room and began walking to our final class, we were approached by throngs of guys, who all started laughing and snickering as we walked past. Mitch must've been spreading his word. Bastard.

**Boomer's POV**

"God, what are you people? **_Five_**? Who cares if I like Blossom? She's a girl, of course I like her!" Brick blurted. A dead silence followed, and then the sound of feminine giggling broke the quiet. Blossom stood down the hall, and then began wildly laughing with her sisters. They were more hysterical than hyenas that had sucked helium out of a party's worth of balloons. He turned an even darker shade of red than he had before gym (which I didn't think was even physically possible). His eyes actually began to tear up, but he was straining to hold it in. As he did, he began to twitch, and as he began to twitch, he bit down hard on his lip. He was brutalizing himself, and all we could do was watch in disbelief.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, in the middle of the roaring laughter that was abusing him, he screamed "**_Stop it!_**" at the top of his lungs and kept it going for about twenty seconds. Everybody shut up. Then, for the first time in ten years, he began to bawl. Brick, our older brother, frontman of the **Rowdyruff Boys,****_ MVP and quarterback of the high school football varsity team, _**collapsed to his knees in the middle of the circle of students, and began to sob and cry, strenuously. He could've opened up a water park with the amount of tears that flowed from his eyes. Nobody could believe anything that was happening. He was the toughest guy on campus, and he was having a total breakdown in front of everybody over a Powerpuff Girl.**  
**

When the tardy bell for the next class rang, Brick instead decided to dash out of the front doors and back towards home. We felt terrible for him, and so we decided to follow him home. It was a terrible way to start a weekend.


	4. Problema-Brick

**Chapter 4:**** Problema-Brick**

**Boomer's POV**

Brick didn't come out of his room for almost four full days. He didn't leave for any reason, whatsoever, whether he needed to use the restroom (he says he pissed out the window and convinced the crazy homeless man that lives on the side of the volcano beneath him that it was raining in the middle of a cloudless day), whether Mojo prepared his favorite hibachi dish for him, or even to talk to us or change his clothes. The only indication that he was even still alive in there is when he would slam out heavy drum solos (he always wanted to be the next Bonzo, even though he knew that's who I always wanted to be), and occasionally play a few chords on his acoustic.

Butch and I couldn't stand hearing him in there. He had no dignity, and sounded as though he hated life. So together, we smashed through his door and caught a giant whiff of cigarette smoke that had practically replaced all of the oxygen. We nearly suffocated in there while searching for him, and when we did find him, he was huddled in the closet, begging us to close the door. We dragged him out of his room by his feet, and when we were clear of the smoke, Butch smacked Brick across his face with all of his might.

"Come on! What the hell is the matter with you?! We're supposed to look up to you, and you get devastated because you got embarrassed over something that doesn't even **_matter_**!" Butch screamed in his face with bulging veins. "Everybody thinks that you're a giant pussy now, because you had a meltdown in front of the whole school, including the girl you wanted!"

**Butch's POV**

"Hey, don't get pissed off at **_me_** when **_you_** damn well know that you both like her sisters! I was simply the one to be humiliated at the worst of times!" He told me with another, yet much less severe river of tears. "I just couldn't take it, anymore! Nothing like that has ever happened to me, before!"

"But, dude, your image is severely altered, now," Boomer chimed, "I mean, you looked like a little girl who didn't get everything on her Christmas list! I know it was humiliating for Mitch to do that to you, but you're looked up to by so many people that you can't just **_do_** what you did!"

"Oh yeah, we'll guess what,**_ I have feelings, too_**! Did you ever think about that for one second? I'm always under so much pressure from everybody, and it's been that way for years! I've had all that crap bottled up my entire life, but this little incident was the bursting point!" He shouted in one long, nonstop breath.


	5. The Dim Bulbs

**Chapter 5: The Dim Bulbs****  
**

**Brick's POV**

Honestly, I had gone overboard with this whole situation, even though it was terrifyingly humiliating. Even though I can take a giant load of crap from everyone, but it just stays bottled inside. As you can imagine, I'm not the most resilient being in the world. My problem was that I was caught with my pants down, and I was never prepared for such a situation. The thought of everyone turning on me never entered my mind. But my brothers were right: I **_had_** taken it like a bitch, and now, I had to go all out to recapture my image.

"And where did you get all those cigarettes?" Boomer questioned. "You haven't touched one in two years!"

"Forget the cigarettes. The most important thing right now is deciding where to start in restoring my reputation!" I answered. "I think the best place to begin, would be restoring my self-confidence, so that way when I return to school, or whenever, I'll have the courage to explain everything to Blossom."

Boomer patted me on my back like I was some sort of canine. "I couldn't agree more, bro. In fact, we all could use some confidence restoration. It's easy to forget that you're not the only one of us whose love stricken."

"Agreed. But how exactly do you propose we practice?" Butch chimed. "How do the losers get the girls in those teen movies?"

**Boomer's POV**

"Well, they do a buncha' different things. Like, sometimes they man up... which is what Brick really needs to do, but that's what we're trying to figure out **_how_** to do." I scratched my head. "It mostly depends on the audience. Sometimes, they save them from a seemingly inescapable situation at the last second... they also beat the pulp outta' the antagonist... when there is one."

"Other times, don't they just beg the chick if they're desperate?" Butch tossed out to us. "Oh wait, we can't do that either... but there's gotta' be some way that suits **_our_** situation!"

"We could show off our athletic abilities." Brick hesitantly choked, almost in the form of a question.

"Yeah, but don't they attend those events, anyway? Plus, they're also supers! It's not like they'd be overly impressed, considering that they could do a lot of that stuff, themselves." Brick and Butch began rattling off ideas.

"We could start a fire and extinguish it!"

"We're not anarchists, anymore! Maybe we could stage a rescue!"

"It would be too overly elaborate, and an obvious set-up! How's about demonstrating our musicianship?"

As they continued back and forth, my eyes began to wander, and I caught a glimpse of some of Mojo's equipment in his see-through indoor lab. Suddenly, I was struck with the most brilliant idea **_ever_** (Ha! Coming from the so-called dumb one)! "Shut up! Both of you!"

**Butch's POV**

Brick and I were interrupted by Boomer (we only focused on him because he **_never_** tries to draw our attention).

"This had better be good, Buttmunch. We almost had the perfect idea!" I warned.

"I saw this movie not too long ago, and what these guys did was use their computer to program and create their own girl, whom they used to receive advice on how to pick up women!" Boomer stated with a smile.

"That sounds sweet and all, but neither of us are **_that_** good with computers! Plus, I'll just assume that movie is probably dated to a certain extent, and those guys must've been total brainiacs!" Brick was intrigued at this point.

"Don't you get it?" Our blue brother retorted, "We don't **_need_** computers! We already know **_how_** to make a girl! We can make our own girl in order to practice for the actual girls!"

Our faces all lit up at the exact same time, and gleeful smiles began to brew across our faces with more intensity than German lager. With our excitement levels beyond our peaks, we soared into the laboratory and locked the door behind us.


	6. Shake, Rattle, & Roll Out

**Chapter 6:**** Shake, Rattle, & Roll Out**

**Brick's POV**

"Boomer! Do we have what we need?" I asked from across the lab. I have to give credit to him for coming up with such a brilliant idea. I never even came close to thinking about doing something like this.

"Not everything," he told me, "we only have the basic elements."

"Whaddya' mean by that?"

"I mean that we only have the sugar, spice, and everything nice. Those are the ingredients for the perfect **_little_** girl! We need some extra ingredients if we wanna' make the perfect **_teenage_** girl!" This was new information.

"Okay, so what do we actually need now?" Butch entered into the conversation.

"I saw it once in an issue of _MAD_ magazine. If I'm right, it calls for sugar, spice, and everything nice, but it also requires make-up, bags, and swimsuit mags... or was it underwear mags?"

"Bags, like handbags and purses?" Butch asked.

"Yeah, and the good news is that those are all pretty easy to find. We just gotta' look for them quickly, so that way, we don't look like perverts." Boomer finished.

"You know, no matter how fast we do this, isn't it going to be somewhat perverted no matter what?" I wondered.

"Yeah, it kinda' will be... but it will all be for a good cause." Boomer assured me. "It will all got towards curing RRFD: **_R_**owdy**_R_**uff_ **F**_emale **_D_**eprivation." He stated, crossing his arms and displaying a smug grin.

"Wow... you couldn't be more desperate-sounding, right now," Butch told him. I chuckled at his comment, not realizing that we must all be pretty desperate to be doing what we were doing.

**Butch's POV**

Man, how are three teenage dudes supposed to collect female paraphernalia without looking obscenely weird? Hint: there's not a way.


	7. Life's A Drag

**Chapter 7:**** Life's A Drag**

**Butch's POV**

When we were out trying to get supplies for the girl, I didn't realize at the time just how insane we had become. We were trying to make things as non-weird as possible, but that's quite a challenge when you're a teen guy attempting to obtain teen girl essentials. Our biggest fear was that someone would recognize us wherever we go. How we be able to explain **_that_**?

The only way we could pull this off is if we went all covert ops on the operation. We needed to go undercover, in a disguise of some sort. Virtual undetectability. So we did by far, the stupidest thing, we had ever done up to this point in our lives... we dressed in drag.

We each had to look back at what our lives had become. We were standing in front of a mirror, putting on chick clothes, high heels, long flowing wigs, baseball caps (Brick just turned his around), and blush (no, it was not enough to go into the mixture). We were sacrificing every last drop of our remaining dignity into this, but in the long run, we'd probably earn it back... eventually.

Our undercover names were equally humorous to everybody except us. I was the sassy one, Blaire (yeah, I almost vomited, too), Boomer was Bailey, the soft one (believe me, I was losing it on the inside), and Brick was the "pristine" one, Bridgette (think of Claire from _The Breakfast Club_). We were the saddest sacks in all of Townsville, but we knew that if we triumphed, we would without a doubt be the happiest.

**Boomer's POV**

What had we become? We were strolling through Townsville together, all dressed up as chicks. You don't know what low is, until you duplicate what we did. Once we finally got over the initial shock of what we were doing, we began walking (to prevent suspicion) over to Townsville Mall (I'm so pissed of that Mojo took the keys to the Audi. All we did was do a few burn outs in the school parking lot!) to grab one of each ingredient. After the first block, we split up, so that way we could later enter the mall from a different place. I was in pursuit of a purse.

Luckily, my destination was only about a mile away from the volcano. I had really hoped that I didn't look too appealing, because as I walked down the sidewalks, guys who walked past me started whistling (if I had a choice, I would've flown, but if I did, someone could easily recognize me). Could a man feel any more disturbed than I did in that twelve block hike? Probably not.

Finally, after what felt like a day's walk in those shoes (they sure didn't feel like shoes), I made it to the bag store in Townsville Mall. I found a blue handbag on a rack close to the door, so I grabbed it, paid for it with all the cash I had, and got the hell outta' there. One item down, three to go. I just hoped things were working out for my brothers.

**Brick's POV**

This didn't make me feel any more manly than the time Blossom pulled my pants down in front of everyone, ten years ago. I had hit rock bottom, and going through the trench was the only solution to climbing back out. Something that became very clear to me once we split up however, was that the people of Townsville are weird enough when they're not under the constant stress of annihilation. Dudes, full grown dudes, we're giving me those stares with petit grins.

These people really must not know what girls look like, considering that I was hit on like, fifteen times in thirty minutes. Even these college-aged freeloaders on 5th Street screwed with me. Instead of asking me for spare change, they started belting the lyrics to "Cherry Pie", out loud for everyone to hear, as I strolled by. People began lining up and paying those guys. I couldn't believe it was possible. I was actually lower than a freeloader.

The grueling hike across town finally came to an end. It was an excruciating escapade. Now I know how Harold and Kumar felt when they finally reached White Castle (naw, they were happier). Down the main area, I ran as fast as my moccasin-clad feet would allow, and finally came across a lipstick kiosk. I ran over, grabbed a handful of random stuff, paid the girl running it, and made a mad dash for the exit. I ran the rest of the way across town, back to the lab, and waited for my brothers who were close behind.


	8. Gentlemen of Science

**Chapter 8:**** Gentlemen of Science**

**Brick's POV**

"I got the purse!" Boomer belted as he hobbled inside. He was jittery and shaky, and I was immediately able to tell that he had probably even more "fun" than I had during the mission. "The only time you are ever gonna' see me in chick clothes again is if the mortuary has a wardrobe malfunction!"

"I hear that," I told him. "Where's Butch?"

"If he's not here, then he must not be far behind me. I mean, how hard can it be to find a lingerie magazine at the mall?"

"I know, right? He got the easiest objective!" We argued about it while we waited for him.

"Hey, Brick, why couldn't we just use one of the _Playboy_ issues that Butch keeps under his bed?"

"Well, we could have, but **_one_**, we want our girl to be a **_regular_** teenage girl, not some sort of overly-attractive floozie. And for the _**second**_ reason, Butch has probably done so much to those mags that she might emerge pregnant or something. And for a **_third_** reason that I thought of just now, I wouldn't touch those if there were a thousand bucks hidden inside, on account of the stuff he's probably done. I swear, when he turns a page, it sounds like someone's stepping on glass!"

"Gross," Boomer looked queasy, and his eye twitched. Moments later, Butch unlocked the door and stumbled into our home with an issue of _Victoria's Secret _tucked under his left arm. His wig was frizzy and wrecked, as though he had sprinted the entire length of the journey back.

"Guys, are, so, **_sick_**..." he told us in-between breaths. "Did you know that I had to walk past a _**construction site**_? They were making cat calls at me!**_ Cat calls_**! **_We_** used to make cat calls! Did we honestly look **_too_** feminine?"

Boomer and I shrugged. Afterwards, we changed back into our regular, non-degrading clothes, and went back into the main lab and locked the door behind us.

**Butch's POV**

It was finally time to get down to business. We had everything we needed, and it was finally time to see whether or not Boomer's late night movie was accurate or not (if it wasn't, I was going to murder him). Brick brought out a large metal tub for the ingredients, and Boomer cleared the countertop to make room for the materials. We were all huddled together with massive grins on our faces.

"What do you think should go in, first?" I asked.

"I vote for the basic elements: sugar, spice, and everything nice. That way, we can guarantee that we'll at least start off with a girl." Boomer told me, as he broke away and began pouring the bag of sugar into the tub.

"Well obviously, we have to start off with those. I meant of the new ingredients!" Brick walked over and tossed the makeup into the concoction after Boomer had finished adding the everything nice.

"I got the purse," Boomer spoke, under handing the bag into the pot.

"And here goes the cherry on top!" I cheered as I slam-dunked the magazine into the mix.

**Boomer's POV**

"Now, we stir at a steady, easy pace until the final result reveals itself," I said to my brothers, copying exactly what I read in _MAD_.

"Wait a second!" Butch suddenly spoke out, making me jump. "Should we, or should we not 'accidentally' add some chemical X? I mean, we **_are_** going after super heroines, so shouldn't we probably practice on a super powered girl, as well?" Brick and I looked at each other, and then shifted back towards Butch.

"That's actually an excellent point," I told Brick. "Yeah, I say we should go for it!"

As Brick started to stir the mix (which already began to display a reaction), I went into Mojo's volatile chemicals storage closet and found a flask full of the stuff. I raced back and dumped the entire flask into the tub. "Whoops!" I said, with all three of us laughing like the mad scientists we had become.

The mixture began to fizz and pop. A small, blinding light emanated from the center of the mass, as the entire room began to vibrate. Suddenly, the light began to rapidly expand within the tub.

"Get ready, boys!" Brick told us as we began to slowly step back away from the action. The vibrant, mellow shakes were soon replaced with those of a large-scale earthquake. Our backs were pressed to the wall, as we continued to watch with anticipation.

All of a sudden, an earth-shattering sonic boom shot out of the tub and sent us and everything else scattering through the air into opposite corners of the room. My head smashed into the door, but I still maintained consciousness. An extremely high-pitch noise tore through the air, almost blowing our ears out. We shrieked and covered our ears as we huddled into the corners of the room. All things glass that were in the room began to shatter and explode into millions of shards, like ceramic frag grenades. Even the extra-thick shatterproof window completely exploded outward and covered the floor in the living room with newer, more painful carpeting.

Bolts and balls of lightning and electricity rocketed all over the room in a beautiful fury. The pure, white light that had began as a small glimmer began to absorb our vision, and was eventually the only visible thing. As far as I knew, I could've been dead and not even known. There was absolutely nothing but white, and it was almost heavenly. If the high-pitch noise wasn't filling my ears, I would've thought that at any moment, I would find myself standing in the line at the Pearly Gates. I clenched my eyes shut and waited for the violent mannerisms to subside.


	9. Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic

**Chapter 9:**** Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic**

**Butch's POV**

As the smoke and dust began to settle, I slowly pressed against the wall to help push myself up. My vision began to recover after having been blinded by the light, and I finally began to start seeing the outlines of various objects. As I began to scan the room, surveying the damage that we had caused (Mojo won't be happy about it, for sure), my eyes, though blurry, caught sight of a figure which was not there prior to the chaos.

"What's that?" Brick stole the words out of my mouth. He was pointing at the same thing that I was staring at. Eventually, Boomer opened his eyes and also looked in surprise from the corner he sat in. In unison, we each stood up and slowly began to walk towards the mysterious entity, which was standing upright on the counter. We stopped when we were about ten feet away, and it was right about then that our vision really began to clear up.

It was a girl! A teenage girl, probably on the edge of eighteen. She was even more cute than I would've ever imagined (She blew us boys away, for it was more than we'd seen). She had the most astonishing eyes that we had ever... laid eyes on (they were sea foam green) accompanied by the finest little smile that a girl could have. Her long, flowing brunette hair went well past her shoulders and down to her upper back. She stood there in lace underwear (excellent figure, I might add, but 'twas not the most important thing to us), staring back at us with excitement.

"Hi!" she said to us, which was rather unexpected and caused us to flinch. She giggled at our skittishness. "Don't be afraid. I wouldn't be. I'm not going to hurt you."

This was way too awesome.

**Boomer's POV **

To me, the unbelievable thing about all of this is the fact that she was our very own creation. Nothing less than our best. I guess it finally pays off after hearing it so many times throughout the years. All I could do was stare at our (more of **_my_**) creation.

"So, what's your name?" she kindly asked Brick, crouching down to our level and never breaking her smile or eye contact with him.

"Umm..." Brick was staring into her large eyes and began tugging at his shirt collar. Obviously, he was excessively nervous. "Brick... My name is Brick." Her smile grew when he told her. She then had one of those breaths/sighs that girls do when they think of someone dreamy, and then shifted her gaze over to Butch.

"What about you?"

"Erm... I'm Butch." He was perspiring like a geyser. I almost lost it when she asked me what my name was, but I somehow managed to keep my cool.

"And my name is Boomer. What's your name?"

She thought about it for a second. "Well, you guys made me, so shouldn't you also name me?"

The three of us guys huddled together.

"What **_should_** we name her?" Butch whispered to us.

I already had a name picked out, and I thought it was the most beautiful name for a girl: Barb, as in barbwire. Not Barbara, not Barbie, not Barbenstein... just Barb. She tilted her head like a puppy, trying to listen in on us. My back was turned to her, and right as I was about to suggest Barb (right after my brothers suggested Megan and Lizzie), she suddenly said,

"I think Barb sounds like a**_ perfec_t **name."

**Brick's POV **

We all turned in shock, especially Boomer, for some reason.

"How did you know I was gonna say 'Barb?" He stammered.

"I just read your mind. Can't you do that with each other?" I stared at my brothers, who were both staring at me. We then just turned back to face her, and slowly shook our heads "no."

"Interesting. I didn't know that." She looked around at the devastated lab. "Nice place you guys have," she said in the most curious, non-sarcastic voice. After her comment on our digs, I immediately remembered that Mojo Jojo (we prefer to call him Mojo, rather than "Dad") was going to be home in about half an hour from wherever he went off to, today. If he saw his lab in this shape, he'd liquefy us... at **_least_**.

"Oh damn! You guys, if Mojo sees his lab like this, were totally screwed!" I yelled. They took a long look around at the mess, and suddenly realized that it was impossible to fix everything that had broken. It was all irreplaceable. We all panicked and began running around, trying to find a place to hide all the broken glassware and such, while Barb simply stood there on the countertop, watching us in our frenzied rush.

She closed her eyes. Her hair began to flow and flutter about, as though it were caught amongst a gentle breeze, even though there was no wind or air conditioning running. Her long, coffee-black, graceful locks began to sparkle and shimmer in twinkles of sea foam and cerulean. Before we could even piece together what had happened, the entire room was spotless. Not one drop of chemicals, not one shard of glass, and not one foreign particle remained where it wasn't supposed to be.

After the freak sanitary occurrence (and us freezing up, again), Barb's hair eased back to hanging loose and free, and her eyes opened. Her smile faded back into place, and she hopped down onto the floor. We were paralyzed with disbelief. This girl was seriously magical.

"Uhh..." Boomer choked, "did you just do, what I think you did?"

"What would that be?" Barb asked with much curiosity.

"Are you... **_magic_**?" Butch just had to ask.

"Oh... you guys can't do that either, huh? Sorry if I'm making you jealous." She laughed. "I just keep forgetting that I'm the only one with magic abilities!"

We all looked at each other, and individually formulated our best idea ever (well, besides making a teenage girl).

"Barb..." I broke the chain of silence. "You are truly incredible!"

"Thank you, Brick! I can still do a whole lot more stuff. Do you want to see?" she happily responded.

"You can show us everything later. But now, we gotta get down to business. Let's get started!"

"Ooh, this sounds like fun!"


	10. Let's Get It Started

**Chapter 10:**** Let's Get It Started**

**Boomer's POV**

Well, we finally had our girl. However, there were some things that needed to be taken care of before we could advance onward with the plan. She needed clothes, and we weren't about to give her the prissy stuff that we wore as disguises. I dug around in my closet and found a really old t-shirt with the members of Heart on the front, as well as a pair of jeans (which was about half of my wardrobe). I gave them to her and turned around, promising not to look.

"What makes you think I mind about watching me get dressed?" she asked.

"Well... I always thought that it was indecent of me to watch." I told her, still turned away. She started giggling.

"You're trying way too hard to be a ladies' man. Girls have difficulty enjoying the company of a boy who is too nervous and stressed," she told me in a calm manner. "Don't worry, we'll all work on it, together." As I've said before, she is our "girl-ru" who is preparing us for the Powerpuff Girls.

Barb must have had some sort of itinerary developed, because the first thing she told us to do was to go downstairs and get the Audi. We told her that Mojo had hidden the keys, and asked her if she could use her powers to help us find them, but she had her own idea.

"I guess we don't need **_that_** car," she spoke. She closed her eyes and clapped her hands together, twice. "Look out the window and check the driveway."

We did as we were told, and parked in the driveway was a brand new, solid white Dodge Challenger with four seats and a convertible top, with a black leather interior and xenon headlights (the license plates even read "RWDYRFF"). After we turned back from the sexy beast, saliva dripping profusely, Barb produced a set of keys. "Who wants to drive?"

**Brick's POV**

Several punches, bruises, and two black eyes later, I emerged victorious and received the keys from Barb. "Woohoo!" I yelped victoriously as I paraded the prize around my brothers.

"That's another thing you should know," Barb spoke up. I stopped hopping around, and suddenly realized that the keys were back in Barb's hand. "Girls don't go for guys who over-celebrate. They enjoy the presence of a man who strikes hard, wins what he worked for, and then congratulates his opponent. Looks like you all need to work on your manners quite a bit!"

"Hey, I have excellent manners! I didn't even look at you when you were getting dressed!" Boomer objected.

"Yes, but did I tell you to look away? No, I did not. I was testing your sense of security, and you are obviously anything **_but_** secure... Drop your pants."

"_**What? Why?**_"

"Exactly. You're not supposed to question it." Man, this girl has unusual methods. "Now let's hit the road before things gets too weird." She tossed the keys to Butch. He squealed with joy, and Barb floated out the door with a smile. We followed her down the extensive flight of stairs to the driveway, beginning to question our new instructor. "Let's head downtown," she instructed.


	11. Down & Out

**Chapter 11:**** Down & Out**

**Butch's POV**

It was well into the night as we cruised through the vast concrete jungle that was our hometown: Townsville. I had the privilege of driving the Beast (I named it), and was going everywhere Barb told me to go, like an obedient little puppy. Everyone's eyes enlarged as we cruised along, unable to comprehend the awesomeness of our machine.

"How does it feel to drive such a vehicle?" she asked me, her hair carelessly flowing in the wind with the elegance that only compares to that of an albatross.

"It feels like I've been over-privileged," I told her with a smooth, steady tone. "Did you customize this in your mind?"

"No, this is just the best car that the dealership had," she told me with a slightly negative voice.

"Aha," I responded, feeling rather stupid. My brothers smiled in the back seats.

"I'm just kidding, I totally thought this car up!" She sprang back to life with a crisp, hearty laugh. I blew a sigh of relief, and started to laugh alongside her, maniacally. I didn't want to look like an idiot in front of her. Good thing she has a sense of humor.

"Based on each of your behavioral patterns, I was able to pinpoint your weaknesses, and therefore discover what you individually need guidance for," Barb told us, reclined in the passenger seat.

"What's my problem?" I questioned her, "You never told me what my flaws were."

She looked at me without adjusting her recline, "You will say 'yes' to anything a woman tells you to do. You're of the submissive type, and girls don't appreciate a boy who does everything that they are told. In fact, they would much prefer a man who asserts their masculinity by saying 'no' every now and then. It proves to her that she's not dating some spineless sad sack, but a man who is indeed his own man." I was speechless.

"Now come on, I don't say yes to **_everything_** a chick tells me to do!" I heavily objected.

Barb said nothing as we rolled up to a red light. Then, she reached over to the tuning knob on the radio and turned it to Townsville's heavy hip-hop station. I absolutely **_hate_** hip-hop, and she knew I did.

"Hmm, I like this station. I like this music," she was testing my every whim. Then, she leaned over to my ear and asked, "Do you like this music, too?" and flickered her eyelashes. My brothers were on the verge of exploding with laughter. I was sweating profusely, wanting to say no, but hey, shit happens.

"Yes," I replied. Barb gave me a "you're bad at lying" stare, and after about ten seconds of pure silence (except for the radio), I added "I mean, no, I don't!" I tuned in on our favorite rock station right as the light turned green.

"You have a lot to learn, Butch," she smiled. "Now where was I? Oh yes," she pointed at Boomer, "You don't say 'yes' **_enough_**. You are simply too afraid of what others would feel about the real you. Insecurity is female repellant, as well as harmful to your mind. Although it's great to be self-conscious, there's such a thing as being overly conscious," she assured him. "You need to loosen up once in a while."

"I guess I never realized just how significant that was of me," he blankly said.

"Brick," she shifted her gaze towards him, and he looked at her, intently. "Over-celebration is nothing more than a self-indulgent, narcissistic buzz that ends in nothing more than a loss of respect, from others and from yourself. It makes you look back and wonder what has become of yourself. Pat yourself on the back and move on," she told him with a mellow overtone. How did we create a girl of such great teachings?

**Brick's POV**

That was one of the greatest things that I've ever heard. That was like, right up there along the lines of something I've heard during Sunday worship: powerful and short, yet meaningful and forgiving (my brothers and I decided to start attending every now and then after we turned good. We don't care what HIM thinks about it).

"It will take commitment and grit on all of your parts, but I can, and will, mentor you into the perfect gentlemen," Barb told us, "in fact, let's begin now!" We had entered the famed Tokyo-Townsville district, and she began looking up and down the street for something. "Pull up to that nightclub," she told Butch, pointing at the neon sign that read _Miyako Mirai 21._

"Did you guys know that there's a district in Yokohama named **_Minato_** Mirai 21? That's probably what inspired the name of this place," Barb told us as though we were on a field trip.

"Isn't this a sushi joint?" Boomer asked. "Every time I've heard the work 'miyako,' it's been affiliated with sushi in some way."

"I've never seen a sushi joint with bouncers," I commented, noticing the gigantic men standing on both sides of the entrance, who looked as though they benched school buses in their free time (like us, except they had significantly more visible muscle definition). I looked down at my shirt and jeans and began to worry. "Aw man! They're never gonna let us in if we're dressed like **_this_**!"

"Oh, I wouldn't worry about that," Barb assured us, once again. She snapped her fingers, and our rock shirts, denim, and patterned slip-ons instantly materialized into full-body silk suits, with a white overcoat and shirt underneath, complete with a black bow tie and leather business shoes. We looked like the Duck Commander crew in the _Duck Dynasty _intro. It was impossible to estimate the full extent of Barb's abilities.

As if it wasn't enough to see what we looked like, we then looked up from ourselves and got a hold of what she was wearing.

Barb wore pearl-colored high heels and a fine silk dress that matched the color of her eyes (it kind of followed the whole Powerpuff dress code idea in eye color to clothes color relativity), as well as a glistening pearl necklace. She had also magically applied the perfect amount of blush to her cheeks, which at this point was radiating with a stronger intensity than that of gamma rays. She looked absolutely incredible.


	12. Big Trouble In Little Tokyo-Townsville

**Chapter 12:**** Big Trouble In Little Tokyo-Townsville**

**Brick's POV **

We stepped out of the car and began walking towards the entrance of _Miyako Mirai 21_. There was a lengthy line of eager people that went on for quite a while, and the guards were being very picky about who they let cross the velvet rope.

"Oh no!" I whispered into Barb's ear, "We're not 21! They'll turn us away!"

"No they won't," Barb calmly replied. Immediately after she told me, I felt a vibration in my pants' pocket. I thought it was my phone, but then remembered that my phone was in my other pocket. My brothers also must have felt it, because they duplicated my actions. I pulled out my wallet, opened it up, and discovered that my birth year had been changed to make me be twenty-two years of age!

When I looked up at Barb in surprise, she wore a small purse over her shoulder (which she must have created while we weren't looking. She did a bunch of stuff when we weren't paying attention, now that I think about it). "I think we're good to go," she said to us, and we began to walk towards the back of the line.

Shortly after we began walking, we heard one of the bouncers call out to us "Hey, you guys! Come over here!" We did as he said. When we approached him, we all gulped in fear... except for Barb, who looked as joyous as she had been all day, without a hint of worry to be detected on any of her features. "Do you guys think that we're gonna allow you to wait in such a long and boring line? Go right on in!" The second bouncer unhinged the rope and waved us in with a toothy grin. How could we say no?

"Hey, man, what the hell? I've been waiting fifteen minutes and haven't moved a **_foot_**!" Some guy in line was losing his mind in a fit of rage as we strolled inside. After the door closed behind us, we could hear the outdoor crowd rioting, but was eventually drowned out as we got further into the club.

"You're really something else, you know that?" Butch told Barb over her shoulder.

"Don't think I don't know **_that_**!" She laughed. We looked around and observed the place: spacious layout, booths, flashing lights, electronic music, and a large, circular bar. I had the feeling that tonight was gonna be a great night.

**Boomer's POV**

The gig was alive and vibrant as ever. All there was were people having good times as far as the eye could see. The bar instantly caught my attention, for it had patterns of cerulean and lapis neon spanning on all the edges. It was a wild sight.

"Look at this, here! They got a lava lamp wall right next to the fish tank wall! Now **_that's_** classy!" I pointed out the badass wall in the back. We would've **_never_** gotten into a place that was **_half_** this nice if it wasn't for Barb. We were so grateful for her effortless efforts.

"I'm gonna go find the restroom so I know where I can vomit later," Butch announced, breaking off into the festivities.

"I'm gonna go see what kinds of drinks they got," Brick told us before walking across the dance floor to the bar. It was just Barb and I who were still together.

"So umm... would you care to dance with me?" I shook when the last three words left my lips.

"That sounds excellent! I didn't think you'd ever ask!" she responded with much enthusiasm. "See, you're getting better, already!"

She was right. I've never asked a girl if they ever wanted to dance with me before, but for some reason, whether it's the fact that I created her, or maybe that she was always honest about the way girls feel, I felt totally comfortable whenever I was with Barb.

We headed out to the middle of the dance floor and began to get rhythmic. We were having such a great time together, and I wanted to tell her how much it meant to me that she was doing everything possible to help my brothers and I out. We danced for at least half an hour before we began to talk business.

"Would you like me to help you out even more, tonight?" she curiously asked In the middle of our slow dance.

"I'll take all your help that you get," I told her, gazing into her beautiful, piercing eyes.

"Alright. This exercise is going to help you build on your confidence and self-respect, but first, you must fetch me a drink."

"Yes ma'am," I skipped over to the bar and ordered a martini (and yes, I was able to convince the bartender that the drink was for my girlfriend) and then trotted on back and handed it over to Barb. She looked intently at the glass, and then flung the liquid onto a giant guy who stood with his back turned towards us.

"Good luck!" she told me, patted me on the back, and turned away. He jumped and immediately turned around to face whoever threw it. Unfortunately, I was too petrified to look away, and so he instantly assumed that I had done it.

"Hey, baby dick! This was my favorite party outfit!" he threatened me, "I can mess you up **_real_** good if you're not careful!" He slowly approached me step-by-step, flaring up like a bull. He was at least two feet taller than me, and I could already tell that this was going to be some sort of David & Goliath style battle. I was quivering worse than a piece of jello attempting to defuse a bomb. I haven't thrown a single hurtful punch in years, let alone be involved in a fight. I raised my hands and balled them into fists.

"Look, man, I'm not here to tangle, alright? I'm here to have some fun with my girl!" I began pegging the guy with the truth as a circle opened up around us and we began to side-step.

The brute glared at Barb, who was in his peripheral vision. "That piece of ass is your girlfriend? Ha! I'll bet you that she was living on the streets less than two hours ago!" he started laughing.

"First of all," I told him with a hostile tone, "yes, she's with me. Two, she is a kind, smart, and rather talented woman, not street trash! And three, she's more woman than you'll ever have the fortune to know, you bastard!" Barb smiled and wiped her eye.

"That's inspiring and all," he told me, "but she should really have a go with a **_real_** man like me!" He started up again with his psychotic laughter.

That sent me over the edge. With all my might, I flew directly into him and cracked him right in the jaw. I could actually feel his jawbone divide into five separate sections in slow-motion. The dude flew across the room as everyone watched in total amazement as he smashed into the bathroom wall, leaving a massive crack.

He got up, bleeding excessively from all over his face, and tried to hobble away, but my mind decided that he shouldn't get off so easy. I yanked him back towards me by his shirt collar, and then picked him up by the seat of his pants, and held him horizontally as though he were a board of wood, and I aligned his head with the exit door.

"You should be nicer to girls, you pathetic..." I swung his body forward, "little..." I swung him back, "**_bitch_**!" With that, I sent him soaring across the ground on his stomach, straight out the door. I stood there, breathing heavily, attempting to vent my anger. The entire place went from lively to dead in the bat of an eye. Nothing made any noise for about thirty seconds, and then, everybody cheered. I guess that dude must have been a major douche to everyone.

My feelings of darkness faded in a warm mixture of pride and happiness. Barb walked over to me and congratulated me for standing up for what was right, and gave me a giant hug.

"You're well on your way, Boomer," she whispered. She was so proud of me. After everyone began dancing again, Butch stumbled up to us from behind with an empty glass In his hand.

"Somebody's gonna be drivin' tonight, and it ain't gonna be me, for damn sure!" he stated, mildly intoxicated. Brick walked up to us, sipping on what I assumed was sake.

"Man, that was even more intense than this stuff is!" He held his half-empty glass in the air, "I'd like to propose a toast to Boomer, for his testicles that were once lost, but now they have been found!" I could sense that Barb was gonna lecture both of my brothers on their behavior tomorrow... if they're not too hungover to listen.

**Butch's POV**

It was about 1:45 at night, and the partying was still going great. Suddenly, six massive guys entered the club in a "v" flight formation, and walked straight up to us.

"Word on the street says you guys gave Big Stan a total beat down..." the largest man told us.

"There was a fight here, yes, but I don't know any guys named Stan," I assured him.

"Well, what you should know is that if you mess with Stan, then you mess with **_us_**!" the man behind him told us in a deep, baritone voice. All six of the guys simultaneously cracked their knuckles. Once again, the entire club fell silent.

"This does **_not_** look good," Brick said softly to himself, taking another sip of his drink.


	13. Rorschach Lullaby

**Chapter 13:**** Rorschach Lullaby**

**Boomer's POV**

After we waited out of kindness for the paramedics to arrive and take the six brutes to the hospital, we decided that it was probably best if we left the club, ourselves. We piled into the car and sped off towards home.

"Wait! Don't go back to the house. Go to Bonsai Gardens Park," Barb instructed me. You'd better believe I did what she told me to do, and the park was only a couple of blocks away. We pulled up alongside the gated entrance and walked in next to the pond.

I never really took the time to observe the pond, and this was the first time that any of us had gone there at night. The water lilies glistened in the light reflecting off of the full moon on the crystal clear, undisturbed pond surface. As I peered into the water, I could see the fluttering of the koi just inches underneath the layer of moonshine. Barb walked up alongside me, and her reflection accompanied mine in the natural floor mirror. My brothers sat down on the grass behind us.

"The water's almost as beautiful as you are," I mentioned to her. She looked at me, once again displaying her signature smile.

"Compliments will get you far in life. It's also best if you are the first one to speak up." She kicked her heels off and lay in the grass on the bank. "Sit with me. I want to show you something." She patted the spot of grass next to her. "Brick and Butch... come sit with us," she looked at them over her shoulder and motioned them. They wandered up and reclined on the earth mattress. "Now, I want you to just sit back, and stare into the abyss of the sky."

We all simultaneously fell onto our backs and focused on the void above our heads. "What do you boys see?" We were too mesmerized to respond immediately, but when we stared more loosely into the ever-expansive Rorschach blot, images that were reminiscent to us developed out of the bright, shining stars.

"There's just so much to say," Butch spoke. "It's like, a beauty that can only be compared to that of a true woman. A rose, if you must, overtaking all that isn't there. The stars may be captivating and plentiful, but far from infinite... in fact, no matter how large a number, it's still as close to infinite as the number zero is. The only infinite entity that exists, of that which comes to mind, is love. All you need is love, and love is all I see when I look at these stars!" He concluded with a sniff.

**Brick's POV**

I've never heard Butch say anything remotely close to that in his life. He actually felt feelings and saw past what we're meant to see. Almost anything that he's ever displayed was full of angst or his lust for action. Instead, he demonstrated his even-minded, compassionate element that was previously nonexistent. I shuddered at the thought that we're just as delicate as a little spider's intricate web.

"Butch. Not even I could've predicted how meaningful you were," Barb softly spoke in a surprised tone.

"You're like a poet!" Boomer told him.

"Years of keeping thoughts and emotions to oneself can do that to a person," Butch told all of us, gripping the bluegrass beneath him.

"Brick. Tell me what **_you_** see." The moonlight was hitting Barb in a way that I couldn't ever re-describe. She was even more luminous and radiant than the moon, even in the darkness of the night. I sprawled back onto the ground, and focused as sternly as possible on the moon and beyond.

"What I see is..." I started, then hesitated. "The stars... are dancing for me, like a literal 'nightclub!' However, amidst the excitement, there is a concealed pain. There's something or someone yearning for a chance to take back whatever evil it has bestowed upon others and themselves. It yearns to love and be loved, and all I can see is the pain of that who wishes to love." I began to tear up. "I'm in pain! Mojo Jojo never truly loved us! He's using us for his own sick, twisted, self-centered narcissistic means!"

Boomer and Butch's eyes began to produce tears. "That's all I can see, too!" Boomer screamed. Barb frowned for the first time, not from anger, but from sympathy. My brothers and I finally began to sob and let the feels out in a group hug. She didn't cry, but was clearly impacted. She began to rub our heads and pat our backs to make us feel better.

"All we ever really needed in life was love. But in order **_to_** love, we **_must_** love, and we never learned **_how_**!" Butch bawled.

**Butch's POV**

"There, there," Barb told him calmly and quietly, as if it were a verbal exchange between a mother and child. "I guess it was a good idea to bring you guys here, tonight."

"*Sniff!* What do you mean?" Boomer asked.

"I expected this to happen. You boys needed emotional cleansing. All of you. This is the perfect way to restart and leave your problems behind. The cleansing process is now completed, and we can finally begin our training. This was a very important night for us, and I am very proud of each of you for going through with this," she assured us with a tiny grin. "We'll come back here tomorrow, after school... well, one of us will."

"Are you gonna start training us individually?" I asked, still hugging her over the shoulder.

"Yes, I will. You all differ so much, that I'll have to work one-on-one with you. Let's worry about that, later. Let's go home and get some shut-eye."

"How come we're so coordinated? I drank so much, earlier!" I suddenly realized. Brick realized it, too.

"I had to sober you boys up for this. You had to be paying attention... but you might still have a morning headache."

"**_And_** we have school in the morning! Can you **_please_** come with us, Barb?" I begged.

"Sure. I don't see why not. I've always wanted to know what school was like."

"Well, I can assure you, you're in for a surprise," Boomer told her. We all walked back to the car and headed home.


	14. A New Morning

**Chapter 14:**** A New Morning**

**Brick's POV**

Once we got home, my brain completely powered off. We all walked into our room and collapsed onto our beds (Barb voluntarily slept on Butch's beanbag chair), and that was that.

We woke up about three hours later to the soothing sounds of the "Hotel California," as opposed to the usual, disruptive, annoying alarm. I rose up out of bed to the odor of waffles. It couldn't have been Mojo, because he hasn't been released from prison, yet, and since Barb was gone from her beanbag bed, she was obviously the one cooking. Out of instinct, I hovered out from under my sheets and into the eating area. She was standing up in front of the stove in the Heart t-shirt Boomer gave her and pajama pants with batter frying in a skillet and Pop-Tarts in the toaster.

"Since when did we start receiving 'good morning' from the Eagles?" I happily asked her, sitting down at my counter seat.

"Well, you know what they say: 'it's best to get off on a good note!' So I got rid of that sad excuse of a way to wake up that you had, and replaced it with something that was **_much_** better." Seconds later, my brothers drifted into the kitchen with nostrils puffing and eyes closed. It was then that I also realized that we were all wearing our regular clothes again.

"What happened to our suits? And how did we get our old clothes back?" Butch asked.

"Well, I sort of cloaked your outfits specifically for when we went to the club. There were no actual suits or dresses, just mere imitations," Barb explained.

"Aww, I really liked those suits!" Boomer claimed as he walked up to one of the neighboring chairs. The Pop-Tarts popped up into the air. Butch gave the pastries a lusty stare and began panting like a tired dog. Good thing to know that he still had some animal within. It's what makes Butch, Butch.

"I decided to mix em' up," Barb told us as she walked over and picked up the pastries, "Cherry and Birthday Cake. Enjoy!" And with that, she tossed them into the air towards us. Boomer and Butch both jumped out of their seats and caught one in each of their mouths.

"What are you guys, baby seals?" I asked, half awake but rather positive.

**Boomer's POV**

_Pop-Tarts are delicious. If school was **half** as fun as catching Pop Tarts in the morning, I wouldn't mind having to go, _I thought to myself. I had caught the Cherry-flavored one, and even though most kids didn't enjoy the cherry pastries, **_I_** sure did ("Cherry Pie" began playing in my head, but then I remembered what Brick told me about his journey to obtain the makeup, and that made me shudder).

Barb looked down at his watch and commented, "Boomer, you'd better hurry up!" I immediately swallowed the rest of my Pop-Tart, and dashed into the bed room to change into some fresh clothes. Well, that was weird of her to only say my name, specifically. I had just pulled my dirty jeans down around my ankles when I heard her say "Peekaboo!" from the doorway. I jumped, and then she fully entered the room. "Still on the sensitive side, I see..." she commented with a smug grin. "It's okay. By tomorrow... you will be **_impervious_** to shame," she assured me, pulling down her pajama pants and putting on some skinny jeans, smiling as to how I would tremble uncontrollably.

"Sure, whatever you say, I choked as I put on a clean set of jeans and walked into the bathroom to brush my teeth. I checked the clock myself, which read 6:43. If we flew to school, we'd make it no problem, but why fly when you have a wet dream on wheels?

Anyways, I slipped into my t-shirt with Moon the Loon's face on the front (drummer of The Who, for all the unfortunate souls who don't know their music... sorry, that was a cruel assumption, and it won't happen again, I promise), grabbed my schoolbag from the hook on the wall, and headed down the volcano side, to the garage, anxious to get behind the wheel again.

Several minutes passed before Barb, Butch, and Brick finally came down. "Shotgun!" Brick called out instinctively and hopped into the passenger seat. Butch took a much more gentlemanly approach and opened the side rear door for Barb.

"Thank you, Butch," she said aloud, and then gave him a peck on the cheek. His eyes grew wider than I ever thought they could, and he blushed as though he were an embarrassed Peanuts character. He finally returned to his senses and got in on the other side. I opened the garage door.

"Let's see what's on, this morning," I said to myself as I flipped on the radio. The intro to "Dream On" by Aerosmith was the first noise that we intercepted. "I think it's gonna be a good day," I said, zipping out of the garage.

**Butch's POV**

Ten minutes later, we pulled into the school parking lot. The other kids froze and stopped doing whatever they were doing, and just stared in awe and jealousy at us. We slipped into our cozy slot, piled out, and headed towards the side entrance right next to the gymnasium. It was there that we were greeted by a familiar figure. "Hey there, boys! Has everything been alright?"

"Everything's been just fine, Coach. Thanks for asking," the three of us replied in unison. Barb stood there with notebooks that she had created tucked against her chest, smiling at Coach.

"So, I guess you must've heard about what happened last week, huh?" Brick solemnly asked.

"Yeah, I heard what happened, and to be honest, I was rather shocked to hear that you reacted that way. I wouldn't say I was disappointed, but you were the last person, well maybe aside from Butch, that I would've imagined ever having an emotional breakdown."

"Thanks, Coach. I really appreciate that," I told him with a straight face to show him that it was actually somewhat serious.

"Well, I'm sorry guys... but hey, I guess it just happens," he told us apologetically. He looked up from us and noticed Barb standing there smiling at him. "Hey, you guys," he asked us in a whisper, "whose that girl? I haven't seen her on campus, before. Is she a new student?"

"Yes, I am new, and my name is Barb," she told him. He was extremely surprised to see that she could hear him from such a distance. "You must be Coach Shank. The boys have told me much about you." She stuck out her hand, still holding her notebooks to her breasts with her other arm. Coach shook it with a smile.

"We're glad to have you here at Townsville High. Now all of you, get inside before they lock the doors on you by mistake," Coach told us.

"**Yes sir, Coach**!" My brothers and I chanted in unison as Barb led the charge to the side door.

"I'll see you three sixth period!"

"**Looking forward to it, Coach**!" The door slammed shut behind us as he began to trek down the main hallway.

_Nothing could make today be a bad day_, I thought.


	15. Brick's Football Buddies

**Chapter 15:**** Brick's Football Buddies**

**Brick's POV**

My little hallway incident happened just over a week ago. Students who witnessed it froze as I walked by, probably thinking that I was a ticking time bomb of emotion. Little did they know, a lot had happened to us boys during our absence, and we weren't going to allow the past to stunt our progress.

"Hey... Brick," RJ MacReady, one of my best friends and the main wide receiver for the football team, approached me, "long time, no see, man. I hope you're good for the big game in a couple weeks!"

"Oh, don't even worry about me, man. Of course I'll be good for the rivalry game. Hell, I'm fine, already! That thing that happened last week was a one-time thing and'll probably **_never_** happen again."

"Well, that's good to hear, man," RJ peered over my shoulder at Barb, who gave him a small wave and a grin. He then turned back to me. "Hey man, is she with **_you_**?" He pointed at Barb, who was observing the lockers.

"**_Her_**? No, she's just a new girl. We became friends with her over the weekend."

"That's what I thought. I knew you had eyes on Blossom, but to be honest, man, it might be a bit of a challenge to hook up with her on account of you breaking down right in front of her. Know what I'm sayin', man?"

"Yeah, I get it... but I gotta plan to convince her that I'm the perfect one! By the way, you haven't seen her anywhere, have you?"

"Nah, man. Haven't seen any of 'em since last week."

"Alright, cool. Thanks for tellin' me," I thanked him.

"I gotta go now, man. I'll see ya' after school for practice."

"See you then," I told him, then shared the varsity group handshake with him, and we parted ways.

"RJ, huh? He seems like a nice boy. He doesn't harass you, does he?" Barb walked up from behind and asked me as she watched him trot down the hall.

"Him? No, of course not! He's one of my partners in crime! We've stuck together through thick and thin over the past few years!" I looked at my watch and realized that we only had a couple of minutes before the bell.

"Don't worry, I have classes with all of you boys," Barb told me as she began running with me to first period physics. My brothers must have split off to their individual classes while we were conversing, because they were nowhere to be found.

"Hey dudes, look! Brick's back!" Alan Covert (the defensive linebacker) announced my presence.

"Hey, Alan. Yeah, I'm back, so what's up?" I tried to play it cool. He wasn't really what I would call a friend so much as a teammate. I sat at my desk, and Barb took a seat next to mine. "Who's the new chick? Is she with you?"

"No, I'm not with Brick. We're just friends," she assured him without dampening her smile.

"You seem awful happy with him for being 'just friends.' Hey Brick, what would **_Blossom_** think about this girl?" Alan shifted his focus back over to me.

"As of now, I don't think she'd care, much. Also, just so you know, this girl's name is Barb!"

"Um... okay." He told me, wrinkling his nose. I just looked away from him, but the peace didn't last long. Someone tapped me on the shoulder, so I instinctively turned to face my confrontation. It was Leon Pantello, better known as "Meat Locker," the largest member of the team (he once got locked in his father's meat locker at the butchery by accident while practicing his tackles on some of the hogs, and spent the night in the freezing temperatures). He was one of my better friends, not as much as RJ, but still a great friend.

"Oh man, what's up, Meat?" We fist-pounded. I was actually excited to see him. "Been stayin' outta the cold, lately?"

"You know me, Brick. I take my coat with me wherever I go to ensure my next time won't be as grueling as the first!" He snickered. He couldn't help but notice Barb looking at him (and of course, smiling) in the corner of his eye. "Dude, whose the new girl?"

"Oh, that's Barb. She's the nicest girl you'll ever meet! Hey Barb, this is my good friend, Leon! Everyone here calls him 'Meat Locker."

"It's a long story," he told her, holding his hand out to greet her. Meat Locker was always a ladies' man, so polite and everything. He lived in Texas for most of his childhood, and the habits he picked up really stuck with him.

"It's a great pleasure to meet you," she told him, shaking his hand. Suddenly, the attendance bell rang, and class began.

**Butch's POV**

I hope Brick and Boomer were having good times, because first period pre-cal for me was just terrible. There were dudes from the football team, like Terry Carmichael, who is close friends with Mitch, as well as Stevie Nixon, Randy Rhoaders, Johnny & Paul Jones, as well as Mick Loaff. They all began pestering me about how Brick let the entire team down with his feelings, and it took every fiber of my being to not destroy them.

_Hey Butchie-boy, how's your brother's therapy sessions goin'? Will he have enough balls to play against Citiesville? When is her sex-change back into a **man** appointment? _They all said, laughing like total idiots. These are the people that my brother is forced to put up with everyday, and now I can actually understand why he may have had that breakdown.

"What's the matter with him anyways, Butch my boy (I **_hate_** when someone I hate calls me 'their boy' as if I were their friend)? Has he given up on life? Does **_she_** need someone to slip her the 'hot beef injection?" Randy asked with a **_stupid_** grin. I couldn't take it anymore. This was my **_brother_** they were talking about!

"**_Get fucked, you guys!_**" I finally stood up and shouted at them.

"**_Butch Jojo, front and center!_**" Dammit, why did I do that in Mrs. Aniston's class. She's a great teacher, and I really liked her, but now I've soiled my two-year good boy streak. I sighed, wiped a tear from my eye, and walked to the front of the class as everybody watched in total silence. "**_Why do you think that you have the right to use profanity in _****_my classroom?_**" The football guys began to softly laugh at me from the back of the class.

"Mrs. Aniston, I **_swear_** that I didn't mean to use that language during your lecture and I'm **_so sorry _**for interrupting! I **_promise_** that it won't happen again!" I begged her to not write me up.

"Sorry Butch, but school policy is school policy. There's nothing that anyone can do about that," Mrs. Aniston replied apologetically. "Just take this note and go to the principal's office. He'll be the real judge."

"Yes ma'am," I told her in an upset, understanding voice. I exited the room and walked down the hallway towards the principal's office. I can't believe that those guys in there act like they're Brick's friends. I had to warn him about it the next time I saw him.

**Boomer's POV**

I honestly forgot that I shared first period English with Mitch. We were all gonna be in bad shape by the time sixth period rolled around.


	16. For Whom The Bell Tolls

**Chapter 16:**** For Whom The Bell Tolls**

**Butch's POV**

As I sat on the bench outside of the principal's office, awaiting my judgment, I was suddenly filled with the most extreme hatred towards those football boys. There was fire in my eyes and steam in my skullcap, but all I did was sit there and think to myself about my poor, unsuspecting, sensitive brother who had befriended these assholes.

_Those pricks. Those lying, dastardly, bastardized, stupid, spoiled, senseless, brutal, no-good fake friend sons of bitches. Brick loses control of his heart __**one time**__, and they're gonna make it their mission to make the remainder of his year a living hell. These people acted like they were true friends with him, and now they're just gonna stab him in the back, _I grimaced at the thoughts that ran circuits in my mind.

"Jojo. Butch Jojo!" Ms. Sigurdsson, the secretary, called out into the hall. I stood up and walked into the office area, and I gave them my note that Mrs. Aniston had written for me. I then entered the principal's office, which was unoccupied, and took a seat in front of the desk.

Several minutes passed before Mr. Tyson, the principal, walked in. He sat in his large, comfy, rotating chair, and never took his eyes off of me. "Butch, what're you doing here? The only time that you've ever come here before was three years ago during your freshman year, and ever since then, you seemed to have been straightened out. Now, here you are in my office, having been sent here by one of the teachers that consider you to be one of their best students, with a note that says you 'used vulgar profanity directed at fellow students during class.' How do you explain something like that?"

"Mr. Tyson, you have to believe me when I say that I didn't mean to say such things out loud! Those boys pushed me to my limit."

"Okay, what boys?"

"They're all part of the football team: Stevie Nixon, Randy Rhoaders, Johnny Jones, Paul Jones, and Mick Loaff." He began to flip through the junior class of last year.

"Mm hmm, mm hmm... alright, I know each of these kids. Letter men, if I'm correct?"

"Yes, sir, they are."

"Now, what could they have possibly done to provoke someone as even-tempered as you?" He leaned forward and raised his eyebrow, awaiting my response.

"I'm quite sure that as principal, word got around to you that last week, there was an incident that occurred, involving my brother."

"Ah, yes. Brick. I'll admit, nobody could've foreseen what it was he did," he replied sympathetically, scribbling something on a notepad.

"Well, it was all because of something that Mitch Michelson said out loud in front of everyone... something that was of a very sensitive matter to Brick, and he was publicly humiliated."

"Yes yes, I'm not surprised. Mitch is infamous for his arrogance at this school. So tell me, how is this connected to your incident in class?"

"A handful of letter men must have witnessed the event, and so they were hazing me about it today, calling him a 'little girl, pussy, wuss,' and a bunch of other stuff along those lines, and the part that angered me is that these are the same guys who act like they're Brick's friends, and now, they're all turning against him!" My eyes filled with water. "I can empathize with him!"

"Now now, Butch, calm down. I can see why you would be upset, but it still doesn't excuse you for interrupting class in your desired fashion. However, since you were honest about what happened, I'm gonna let this be your one get-out-of-jail-free card. Just don't ever let this happen again, understand?"

"I understand, sir," I sighed in relief.

"I know that you don't lose your temper very often, but maybe you should try to find other ways to vent your anger," he told me. I nodded in agreement. " And don't worry, I'll get on those boys. Now, go on back to class, the bell's gonna ring-"

**_*Riiiiiiiiiiiiing!*_**

"Well then, I guess you should get going to second period."

"Yes sir," I ended the conversation by standing up, grabbing my stuff, and walking out of the office.

**_Five hours later..._**

**Boomer's POV**

**_*Riiiiiiiiiiiing!*_**

Sixth period, the one class that we all look forward to had finally rolled around. It was about time, too, for it was the only opportunity up to this point in the day where I could sweat out the words that Mitch was laying down on me.

I stopped thinking about it when I walked into the dude's locker room. Butch and Brick were already in there, changing into their Phys ed clothes. To my surprise, Barb must have followed them in and they must not have noticed her, and she began to undress a couple of locker rows away. Other boys stopped changing themselves and began to stare at her own disrobing with giant smiles. She wasn't even paying attention to them.

I ran over to her without saying a word, scooped her up in my arms while she was in nothing but underwear, along with her gym clothes (that she must have magically conjured up), and jogged with her in my grasp out the door, down the hall, and dropped her off in front of the girl's locker room. "You change in here," I told her nervously, somewhat stirred up over the fact that she had started changing clothes in the guy's locker room.

"Oh, alright," she sighed and agreed, "I just thought that you boys wanted me to be with you at all times."

"Please just tell me you were gonna keep the underwear on."

"Well, I noticed that some of the guys had completely stripped, so I thought-"

"Oh, thank **_God_** I got here in time, or that could've been a **_disaster_**." I was extremely relieved.


	17. Sixth Period

**Chapter 17:**** Sixth Period**

**Brick's POV**

Through the amazing power of persuasion, Barb was able to be with us through the entire class. After we all changed, we ran outside to start our warm ups, together. As I looked over towards the football field, I noticed that the cheer squad was practicing various routines... and Blossom was the cherry on top. Looking at her from this angle, I could totally see as to how she has maintained the position of cheer captain since freshman year.

Bubbles was underneath, and then Buttercup was holding up the entire cheer diamond (thanks to Buttercup, our school didn't have a cheer triangle, we had a cheer **_diamond_**) with one arm behind her back, eyes closed with a smile on her face, and not even breaking a sweat. Might I also point out that their cheer uniforms fit them **_perfectly_**. I was glad they did, because it would help that much more in distracting the enemy team for the upcoming game.

"Is **_that_** Blossom?" Barb snuck up on me, looking at the top of the diamond.

"Yes, it is."

"She's so pretty. I'm so happy just to think that one day, sometime very soon, you're gonna be holding her hand in holy matrimony."

"Woah, woah, Barb," I backed away, looking at her with my hands up, "What makes you think that things will ever go **_that_** far? As of right now, I just wish for a relationship."

"I don't think..." she smirked and approached me "I know." She stuck her finger in my chest. "By the time I'm done with you, you're not gonna be alright for her... you're gonna be **_perfect_**!" She then trotted off to go talk to my brothers, leaving me curious and confused.

After that awkward pause, I snapped back into reality and jogged over to where Meat Locker and the other guys were standing out on the football field.

**Butch's POV**

I saw Brick run off to his friends (I know Meat and RJ well enough to know that they are actual, **_real_** friends), and Barb came up to Boomer and I. She was rubbing her hands together as though she were concocting some more of her voodoo... or maybe she was just thinking of something to say.

"What're you boys doin? Why aren't you goin over to socialize with **_your_** friends?"

"We don't have any friends..." Boomer told her, morbidly (man, that was morbid). He regained control of his thoughts and corrected himself. "I-I mean, not in this **_class_**. We don't have friends**_ in this class."_**

"Well, why don't you try and make some new friends?" She tilted her head at him. "Tell you what, what do guys usually do out here?"

"Well," I started up, "We usually either run sprints, long jump, or throw discus' around."

"That sounds interesting. Do you mind if I join you boys?"

"Are you kidding? Not at all!" We strolled over to the equipment shed, unlocked the door (Coach gave us the combination), and sifted through all the stuff in there until we found what it was we needed. We grabbed two discus frisbees and made our way out to the empty soccer field.

"Barb, do you wanna catch, or do you wanna throw?" Boomer asked her.

"What do I do?"

"Well, if you throw, then you sling this frisbee-like thingy as far as you can, and we'll try and catch it wherever it goes! If you want to catch, then you try and catch it wherever **_we_** throw."

"I guess I'll throw until I get the hang of it," she suggested, catching a disc that Boomer underhanded to her. He and I began walking out to the middle of the field, while she stood in one of the goals. "Where do you want me to throw?"

"Surprise us! You're really good at that!" She reared back and sent if slicing through the air like a wild buzz saw. It was flying straight for my head, but Boomer intercepted it out of nowhere.

"Do you boys ever play this with anyone else?" she asked from across the field.

"Barb, discus frisbee would **_kill_** normal people," I told her.

"Oh..." She paused, then started to laugh, uncontrollably. Boomer stared at me in confusion. I couldn't think of anything better to do other than stare back. After she calmed down, wiping a tear away with her hands on her knees, she spoke up, once more. "That was a stupid question!" She giggled some more. We smirked at her temporary loss of sanity.

"Do you want this frisbee back?" I asked her, holding the disc up in the air.

"Sure," she smiled again, and so I tossed the frisbee back to her. We continued playing all the way up to the shower bell.

**Boomer's POV**

We began walking back to the building, together. Barb was strolling next to me with both of her arms behind her back.

"How was your first day of school?" I asked her.

"Well, I'd say that it was a splendid experience, overall. I knew everything that we were learning like the palms of my hands. The people are so nice, as well! You wouldn't believe how many boys were greeting me in the halls!"

"Yeah, there's probably something behind that... but you had a good time?"

"Yep. I don't see how it's possible for kids to **_not_** like high school!"

"Woah. Play your cards right, and you could practically run this school."

"Do you really think so?"

"Perhaps." We walked inside and began heading to the locker room. I noticed Barb was still trying to walk with me, so I put my hands on her shoulders and walked with her in front of me, until we were once again, in front of the girl's locker room. "For the love of God, **_please_** shower in the girl's locker room!"

"What's the matter with showering with you boys?" She asked, giggling.

"Yeah, we're gonna have to have a **_long_** talk about this, later," I told her. I then jogged back to my appropriate room and waved at Barb, who smiled, waved back, and went into her room.


	18. Just Say No

**Chapter 18:**** Just Say "No"**

**Butch's POV**

It's now been almost an hour since we were outside, and now, Boomer and I were sharing seventh period economics, counting down the ticks on the clock as the second hand cautiously approached 2:30. We were both already doing great in that class, so it didn't really hurt us in the sense of us not paying attention in the last few minutes. We were simply anxious to meet up with Barb, again. Brick always has football practice that he has to attend, so I know that Barb would use her better judgment and not want to distract him.

**_*Riiiiiiiiiiiiing!*_**

The final bell rang, and we all raced down the halls to the front of the building, where we decided to meet up.

"Alright, you guys go off and do whatever you do. I got football practice to attend to," Brick told us. "Gotta start working on my game again!"

"You go ahead and do that," Barb spoke to him, "I won't interfere with your practice."

"Aw, well thanks for thinking that way, Barb, but you wouldn't be a burden if you were to show. Anybody is allowed to spectate."

"Well, if I'm busy watching you practice, then I can't be out helping your brothers."

"Oh, that's true. Maybe you can watch tomorrow's session?"

"Definitely."

"Sounds good to me," he nodded as he ran back to the gym. Barb turned to me after he had left.

"Boomer, Butch and I have some stuff that we have to take care of... alone. You don't mind flying home by yourself today, do you?"

"No, not at all," he was surprisingly understanding.

"I will see you in a few hours," she told him.

"Alrighty then," he smiled, waved, tossed her the set of car keys, and took off for home.

"Come with me, Butch. Your exclusive training has begun." We began to walk towards the car. She got into the driver seat and took off for downtown.

"Whaddya got in mind, Barb?" I asked, skeptically.

"A little test. Something I concocted while thinking about your little problem of being unable to say 'no.' You'll discover very soon that rejecting ideas can be helpful and healthy in a relationship."

"But what's wrong with saying 'yes?"

"It's dangerous. You'll find yourself being bogged down with stuff that you impulsively agreed to without even realizing that you had done so."

"Oh," I replied, almost silently.

"For instance-" Barb told me. She didn't finish off her sentence, but what she did finish off was the Challenger, when she sent it rocketing off of the curb, and head first into a gigantic oak tree. If my seatbelt hadn't been fastened, the dashboard would've brained me.

"**_What the hell just happened_**?" I asked her, rubbing my head after having hit it on the roof. My vision was blurry and stirred. When I regained my senses, I saw her step out of her side of the car and walk over to survey the damage. She had completely trashed it. There was a shattered headlight, the hood had crumpled as though it were constructed out of tinfoil, the windshield was in shards, and the engine was pouring more smoke than a Brit pours tea in an entire hour. "**_OhmyGodohmyGodohmyGod_**!" I began to mindlessly sputter.

She paces her eyes back and forth for awhile, and then looks at me in my seat, and tells me, "Oh no! I'm so sorry, Butch, but I don't have any money! **_You're_** gonna have to pay for this."

"**_What_**? You think **_I'm_** gonna pay for something like **_this_**? You're the one driving! Plus, do I **_look_** like I have that kind of money?" I shouted back at her in my state of shock.

Barb backed away and looked at me in horror as though I were a nuclear warhead with ten seconds left on the timer. I was fuming at her ridiculous statement, and my breaths were hard and heavy, like a Led Zeppelin drum solo.

She looked as though she was about to cry, which would be a first for her. Instead, after sharing thirty seconds of terror, she unexpectedly began to slow-clap, and her frown was suddenly flipped upside down. I had not the slightest idea what was going on.

"Bravo, Butch! Bravo! You did it! I'm so proud of you!" She began to jump up and down as her rate of claps increased.

"What? What are you talking about?" I was so confused, and the impact of the crash only added on to it, on top of all the engine smoke blowing directly in my face.

"You said 'no' without me having to tell you! This is such a giant leap in the right direction!"

"You almost killed me just so that I would say 'no?' **_You're absolutely crazy! What about the car?_**"

"What **_about_** the car?" she smiled, closed her eyes, and snapped her fingers. In the blink of a nanosecond's eye, the car was tip-top, not a scratch, dent, or crack anywhere. My headache had also vanished. She stepped back into the car.

"So... you intended to crash?" I asked curiously. "You were just testing me?"

"One-hundred percent," she happily assured me.

"Barb... I'm so sorry for exploding like that towards you..."

"Pssh, don't worry, Butch! You were **_supposed_** to react like such! How else should a man react to his car being trashed?"

"Excellent point."

"I'm still not done with you, yet."

"Dammit. Can't wait to see what you got in stores for me, **_now_**!" We backed out of the grass and back on the road, and zipped away. I don't care that she used magic to heal my head wound, I was still totally shaken up.

"Let's get something to eat," she said. "Are you hungry?"

"Starving."

"I'm okay with anything you want..."

"Okay, how about Chinese?"

"Eh... how about Italian?"

"You told me you were fine with whatever I wanted!"

"Yes, but I would rather go get some Italian!"

"No! I say we get Chinese, like you said I could, dammit! **_Don't change the rules!_**" I borderline yelled.

"Okay, very good, Butch. You've got the hang of it at this point, I think. If anything, just work on not having such an aggressive delivery." She clapped once (I was driving this time).

"That was another test? I don't know whether I'm passing or failing, at this point."

"Believe me, you're passing," she assured as we pulled into the parking lot of a new place called Wing Tip Shu's.

After we had finished our meals about an hour later, and with the delicious lemon chicken hanging in the air from every individual breath of mine, Barb took the wheel and drove to an all too familiar music shop, downtown, went by the name of Rawk Awn. This is the store that, within its possession, contained the Olympic-white, 1964 Fender Stratocaster that I've always wanted (with three triple single-chord pickups and a whammy bar). That beaut must cost a fortune, and I've never been able to make even a fraction of what it's worth.

We strolled on into the store, observing the assortment of guitars, percussion, and various other musical entities. The Strat was nestled in its large, glass display, away from all the others, kind of like how at those arcade/restaurants how they would always have the massive elephant or whatever on the top shelf.

"Is that your dream set of strings?" Barb motioned to the "Olympiad."

"Nah, I've been staring at it way too long to show that I have any interest whatsoever for it," I replied, wholeheartedly and sarcastically, followed by a sudden burst of laughter.

"Well, despite its features, in my professional opinion, I say that you should go with this guitar," and in a matter of seconds, she had galloped over to the guitar rack and selected a dainty, maroon-colored Squier.

"I appreciate your criticism and recommendation, but this here Strat is what I **_truly_** desire, Barb."

"But this one-"

"**_No_**."

"Okay, you're still good!"

"You've given me more tests this evening than I've taken in the past **_term_ **for** _school_."**

"Well, at least you know what to do, for these tests."

"And also, what makes you such a guitar expert? What could you possibly do with a guitar?"

Without saying a word, she picked up the Squier that she had found, plugged it up to a nearby amp, and stared at me with her adorable signature smile. Without looking down once, in fact, without even blinking once, she began to play the opening guitar riff to Jimi Hendrix's "Crosstown Traffic." My eyes grew as large as dinner plates as I stared in disbelief. As she finished up, her smile grew wider.

"I have once again underestimated my creation, and for that, I apologize." My eyes paced around the store, looking for the clerk. "Hey, where's the clerk?" The only other people inside were some other random customers. "I know! I'll use the 'may-I-help-you' riff." Good thing I've watched _Wayne's World_ forty-six times. I played the brief metal riff.

"May I help you?" A smiling dude with long hair approached us. The riff never fails!

"Uh, yes. I'd like to take a look at this Fender Stratocaster, please."

"Oh, really?"

"Yes."

"**_Again_**?"

"**_Yes_**."

"For the sixtieth time?"

"Sixty-second."

The clerk gave me a funny look as he took the key to the display and opened it up, and then handed him the Excalibur. It felt even more perfect in my hands this time than the other sixty-one. "I'll bet this is what a Hattori Hanzo sword feels like!" I said as I thought of something to play, settling on "Sympathy For The Devil." Man, if there was ever a more euphoric, mellow feeling in the world, it would have to be in another dimension, because nothing felt better than that guitar (well, except for maybe one thing, but I'll wait for that). It was like sex on six strings.

"Hey, Butch? Can I please put the Fender back, now?" The clerk politely asked after I pleasures myself for a few minutes more.

"Umm..." I thought, puzzled. Barb tapped me on the shoulder.

"Check your pockets. You've earned this," she whispered into my ear. I reached down and felt two separate wads of cash.

"Not today, my good man. I'm feeling kinda saucy. I think I'm gonna buy it!" I told him before pulling the stacks out. "Do you accept cash?"


	19. Things That Go Boom In The Night

**Chapter 19:**** Things That Go Boom In The Night**

**Boomer's POV**

It had been several hours since school had ended, and I was bored beyond fathomability. You'd better believe that I was happy when Barb showed up with Butch, who had more confidence and happiness present upon his features than I had seen him with in a very long time. He held the Strat that he had always gotten all googly over in his hands.

"That was quite an experience," he told me as he walked past, into our room.

"Woah. I've never seen him so proud, Barb! What did you **_do_** to him?"

"That will remain personal between Butch and I, as will what I plan on doing with you, will remain between you and I." She batted her eyes. She motioned with me to come towards her with her with an easy hand motion. How could I say no? "Follow me. I'm with you for the rest of the night."

We walked back out the door and down to the driveway where the Chariot rested. I took a seat in the driver's side as she got into the passenger side. "Where to, my lady?" I giggled.

"Where did I tell you we would go a few nights ago?" She asked me as I thought for a moment.

"Oh, you wanted to go to Bonsai Gardens Park with **_me_**?" You did not tell me that." Without further hesitation, I took off down the road towards the park. At this point, the only light filtered from the surface of the moon above, and from the occasional stay-up-all-nighter's apartment.

We pulled up just outside the main gate, which was still open to the public. We strolled on in, and I followed Barb over to the main pond. Everything was just as it was only a few nights before, with the still, shimmering water beaming with only the light that bounded from the glorious moon in the eternal sky. Leaves and petals of Japanese-imported cherry-blossoms fluttered about in the tiny breeze. The sheets of grass nestled between my toes. "It's so peaceful," I spoke softly to myself.

Her eyes glittered as she turned and smiled back. "You're so calm, Boomer. There's nothing more soothing than an easy companion."

"I hear that. I don't think I've ever been in such a relaxing scenario in my entire life. This tranquility compared to my everyday life, the difference is mind-boggling."

"Well, just be glad you have this moment, for the lesson is about to begin."

"What lesson?"

"To ease your tension. You need to loosen up and live a little." She softly reminded me.

"Do you still think so?" I asked insecurely.

"I can tell just by listening to your voice," she grinned, turning back around to face the pond.

"May I ask though how this place pertains to your lessons? I mean, it's calm and all, but what **_are_** we doing here?"

"Trust me. It will all become clear, soon enough," and with that, she kicked her shoes off, allowing her feet to take a nice inhale. She then nabbed a fistful of her shirt and began to pull it off, over her head and tossing it aside with such elegance. The moonlight bounded off of her silhouette as he turned back around to gaze into my eyes.

"Please tell me what's going on," I began to shake from incoming nervousness. "This is making me **_very_** uncomfortable, Barb."

"Exactly my point! You're supposed to be excited, right now," she explained in an oddly happy tone.

"You are a very unorthodox mentor. But if what you tell me to do works, well, then, I guess it works."

"Okay, then unbutton your pants and slide them down your legs."

"I don't know what you're going for... but I guess I'm crazy enough to try it," I laugh-sighed as I slowly took my jeans off, standing in front of her, shivering in my shirt and underwear. "Now, will you tell me what you're making me do?"

"I'm not making you do anything. I'm letting you **_live_**," Barb told me in a soothing voice as she Began working on **_her_** jeans, tossing them aside. Now, she was standing there in only her underwear. This had finally reached the boiling point of awkwardness.

"Barb, with all the assurance in the world, I'm telling you that whatever it is that you're trying to do isn't going to work. In fact, this is just making me even **_more_** concerned about you." As she heeded my words, all she did was smile and nod. Then, after much thought, she, swear to God, hand on a Bible, took her top, and flung it at me. My face caught it as I stood there, petrified. She was staring at me, topless. Then she unwrapped her panties from her being and threw those aside, so now she was standing before me, completely nude. I was in total shock.

"Would you like to go for a swim?" Barb asked me, slowly turning around as if she **_wanted_** me to get an eyeful. She then took a few fast paced steps towards the pond and dove into the liquid crystal with the elegance of the cherry blossom petals which settled along the surface. She poked her head and shoulders above the surface as she floated there, like an ecstatic alligator.

"What goes on in your **_head_**? You know what, maybe you shouldn't tell me," I told her from shore.

"Calm your nerves and hop in. The water's great!" She flipped her hair behind her back. She was glowing even more than the moon, at this point, and was even shinier than a glossy new paint job. "Most **_men_** would **_kill_** for such an opportunity, with such a **_pretty girl!_**" You could see the koi dazzling in a circle around her beautiful submerged figure as though she were a goddess to be worshipped.

"I'm not trying to shoot you down, Barb, I'm really not. But now, I get the feeling that you wanna do more than just skinny-dip alongside me, and I want you to know that it's just not in me to **_do_** that."

"I just want to swim with you, is all."

"Yes, but I don't think that **_fornicating_** would help me build confidence. I'm an abstinent man. Do you know what I mean? Didn't you ever read **_that_** from my mind?" Barb froze in the water, still looking into my eyes. Then, she began laughing heartily.

"Boomer, I applaud you for admitting to me that you're not some wallowing pig stranded in the teenage wasteland, but honestly, **_all_** I wanted to do was go swimming with you! I mean, it's not **_all_** I would do, if you told me to do more, but I really appreciate how you've made your own life choice to follow the positive path. In fact, this is the first time you've ever really spoken out towards me, and **_that's_** what I was going for."

"But you told me that my problem was that I never say 'yes."

"Hey, I got you to disrobe in a public park. That's a **_sure_** indication that you've improved."

"Also, just so you know, I would **_never_** take advantage of you like that, **_ever_**. That's just plain wrong!"

"Thank you, Boomer." Her eyes gleamed as her lips formed the most beautiful variation of her smile that I've ever seen. A tiny tear of joy streamed from her eye, and with that, I knew she could not be more proud. "Well, I guess we'd better get going, now," she told me, shuffling towards the waterside.

"Wait!" I blurted. She stopped and looked at me. "Do you still wanna swim with me?" I boldly asked, removing my shirt.

"Only if you want to," she smirked happily.

"I'd be honored to," I told her, stepping away and then running full force towards the pond and executing a perfect cannonball, briefly interrupting the nighttime tranquility. I shivered upon resurfacing. "By the way, how come you took all your clothes off?" I asked, smirking.

"I thought that you're **_supposed_** to swim naked!" She laughed.

We had more fun in those thirty minutes than I've had in my entire life, doing laps, performing dives, and just having random small talk. She had wrapped her arms around my neck in an embracing hug, pressing her bare chest against mine, and so naturally, my hands just wrapped around her back right under the surface as I held onto her like a boa. I just couldn't take my eyes off of her face. Her adorable, beautiful, mystical, giggling, joy-filled face. Suddenly and unexpectedly, her lasso tightened and she gave me a giant kiss on the mouth, and not just any kiss, but the type of kiss that leeches all of the bad in your life away and whisks it off into oblivion. I wanted to retract, but I decided to let her have her moment, for she had earned every sliver of pleasure of that which came out. After the longest (yet most interesting) fifteen seconds of my life, she pulled away and looked at me, surprised.

"Um... I say it's getting rather late. We should probably head home, now." She jittered, slowly stepping out of the water, bare bottom gleaming in the lunar lighting. Suddenly, the awkward feeling from before returned, and I followed her out of the pond, grabbed her clothes, gave them to her, grabbed my clothes, walked together to the car, and drove back to the volcano. Not a single word was uttered between us during the ten-minute trip.


	20. Going For It

**Chapter 20: Going For It**

**Butch's POV**

Good morning, Townsville! It was another beautiful Saturday morning, and so I had an entire day to kick back and relax. The Floyd gave me the wake up welcome-wagon to the tune of "Wish You Were Here." When the day starts off with a soothing vibe, you know it's gonna be an astounding day. I sat up in bed and stretched my toned arms, put on some pants, and walked out of the bedroom, shirtless, with my brothers behind me, just waking up.

"I'm hungry," Brick told us as he fumbled his cap onto his head. "Maybe we could do that Pop-Tart thing again!"

"That was way cool!" Boomer responded. "I hope I get cherry-flavored, again!"

"That's the first time I've ever heard somebody say that!"

"But they **_are_** really good!"

Even though I was perfectly fine from the crash, I just couldn't shake an eerie feeling that I had about Barb. She was like the therapist in the movie _Anger Management_, in the sense that they deployed their psychotic techniques without a moment's notice. I wasn't entirely sure if I felt completely safe around her or not, anymore.

**_-Fast Forward 2 days-_**

Okay, I'll admit that even though Barb made me fear for my life the other day, her advice was more golden than Ponyboy. The effort and elaborate scenarios that she seamlessly toiled to create all payed off, and so when I walked into the school, the most insane burst of confidence surged into my body. Since it was the grace period before school actually began, I headed over to my locker (which happens to be only a couple slots down from our good friend, Meat Locker) to stash some books. After I non-aggressively slammed the door, I turned to my right to see Buttercup unloading miscellaneous chick stuff into her locker.

I stood there for a few seconds, contemplating over what I should do, thinking about this thing that I once heard about during a Sunday service, saying that stepping out of your comfort zone for a short amount of time, maybe even just a brief twenty seconds of insane courage, could change everything. I decided that what I had in mind was the right thing to do.

I slowly walked up to Buttercup, who hadn't yet noticed me. I cleared my throat as I prepared to talk. Shivers rattled me in my sneakers, but I quickly shook the icky sensation away.

"Hey there, Buttercup." The first shot had been fired. She turned and we both shimmered into each other's eyes. She gave me a half-surprised, half-excited look.

"Oh, hello Butch. I haven't seen you around for a few days. What's been going on?" Woah. I knew that guys and girls were supposed to interact like this, but I never thought that she'd go on ahead and ask the first question. Then again, who am I kidding? She's the extraordinary Buttercup!

"Man, I don't even know where to **begin,**" I started up.

"Could it have started with Brick's little episode a couple of weeks ago?"

"Umm, well, about that-"

"Oh no, Butch. I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to bring it up! I know that it was hard on everybody, but I'm not trying to make you feel bad about it." Sorrow emanated from her features.

"Well... do you know why it was that he broke down?"

"Yes, I know... and Blossom knows, too."

"Well, damn. How did she know?"

"She overheard the conversation leading up to the incident. You guys are right, though. Mitch has been a total dick lately, and my sisters agree. He used to be so sweet and kind... crazy and broke, but still sweet and kind, to a certain extent."

"Well, I certainly hope that there were no misinterpretations."

"So um, Butch... what was it that you wanted to talk to me about?"

"Oh right... Buttercup, I came here, to ask you if-"

"I'd love to!" She suddenly sprang with joy and excitement.

"Say what, now?"

"Well, judging by your approach and the fact that you're looking all sweaty, I was assuming that you were gonna ask me out. To be honest with you, I've kinda been looking forward to this for quite awhile, but never knew if you thought you were ready for me... and the idea of the guy asking the girl out sounds totally romantic to me."

"So, that's it? We're a couple now?"

"I would hope so," she laughed.

"Can I call you?"

"Anytime... just don't call the hotline phone," and with that, she whipped out a piece of notebook paper, swiftly wrote her number down, and handed it to me. The bell finally rang, and so we gave each other a hug and parted separate ways. I raced down the hallway to class with a newly-formed permanent smile.


End file.
